I'm listening to this album right now (by Red Hot Chili Peppers) and feeling nostalgic. It came out 10 years ago and used to be one of my favorite driving songs. I have very fond memories of driving down the Las Vegas Strip listening to that album with Michelle, Paul and Lisanne.

In fact I used to really enjoy driving a lot. Every time I did it was like a mini-vacation from life. But now I have chronic headaches and eyestrain and likely am not helping that by being at the computer for most of the day.

My car of 11 years (from 1996-2007 ish) was taken from me too due to being ruled by Canadian law to be unfit to drive. I've gotten $4k back for a savings fund, but it's still sad... that car was a big part of my late teens and young adulthood, and took me on that last, long journey from California to Quebec five years ago.

I was told just last night that Wardragon is dead - the game I played Archana in. I'm not surprised at all, but it is still saddening. I think of all the games I played on OpenRPG I had some of the best times with WD40K. However, I understand the reasons for it ending.

Archana will live on in some way, so it's not too bad. I intend to keep writing about her, possibly even find other game(s?) to play her in if that is possible. As mentioned before, one of the Anthegenia novels actually involves a story with her as the main character.

I may not be going after all, though I'm still weighing my decisions.

Basically, I'm still having horrendous delays with immigration. As I have explained before, the fault is because of a mistake Jon made as my sponsor (completely innocently, but nonetheless, it put a HUGE WRENCH in my immigration process). So it's taking an unreasonable amount of time for me to get my permanent code so I can attend as a resident and not have to pay $11k for a single semester.

On top of this, I'm severely depressed and still unable to get any treatment because my health card STILL hasn't arrived.

I was, incidentally, recently rereading some ADoA scenes. Namely the ones where Alexsei came to rescue Ryshassa after the kidnapping, when she was already deeply changed by the emotional manipulation, rape and torture she went through.

(I do still reread the Ryshy kidnapping scenes now and then when in a particularly masochistic mood.)

It struck me while reading them that I truly did not appreciate the powerful feelings my husband put into his posts as Alexsei. They were lengthy but very beautiful, personal and heartfelt, and I knew that he wasn't writing them 'for show'. He was writing them because he wanted to save not just Ryshy, but me as well. He wanted to show me that he loves me even when I hate myself, even when I try so hard to make myself look like a monster.

Oy, trying to work my brain around a new college system, 10 years after my first college, is really tough. I had to juggle around a bunch of PDFs trying to figure out WHICH was the RIGHT schedule, and what classes exactly do I need to take and so forth. But I mostly arranged how I hope my schedule will go. I transferred 15 units total (all general ed.) and decided I'd be better off just starting over fresh with CS courses.

So that means I'll be at Concordia University for 6 semesters minimum. That's still taking the bare minimum I need to be a full time student (12 units). The 15 I did decide to transfer helped me out, since the usual Canadian university level is actually 3 years, not 4. Otherwise I'd have to take 15 unit semesters and I so do not want to do that. Instead I'm taking 3-4 classes a semester. I hope it'll not be too much of a strain.