Because I can't stand my life...

I make characters like Ziziri: a cannibalistic Full Moon Lunar with a hyena totem, my entry for a barbarian game I may or may not get accepted for. She's even more of a violent catharsis than Huntress, who turned out to be fairly well-spoken and subtle (well, she IS a Day Caste), while Zizi truly relishes and *thirsts* for killing. I'm amused this Lunar could end up more evil than any of my Abyssals. :P

Nekira, if you're reading this, I'm really sorry x.x but I need more time alone. :( Forum games are just less... 'direct' communication for me, so I feel safer with them in my current state of mind. Next week, though, I'll definitely contact you. With many, many apologies.

Speaking of forums... I'm still open for more character applications for Outcastes on the Open Sea. More high quality RTJs would make me happy. For those of you new to RPoL, don't shy from commenting on this entry (well, could email too but I'm not really checking my email lately *sigh*) or clicking the "Request Access" link on the game page and sending me a PM that way.

If you're new to Exalted you can also comment and/or PM. I can do my best to explain stuff and show you books if you don't have them. Though this will not be the only Exalted forum game I start -- I will also be running some on my site, whenever I figure out the dice-roller (progress is made... I'm going for a DHTML form with submit button linked to a PHP script -- likely part of the bbpress plugin -- that will store the die rolls. I mean ok, crude and simple, but it works.)

Outcastes is a game I put together more to get myself used to running games via forum, while I'm still getting my darksiren RP forum set up. It's Exalted mostly cause I'm most familiar with Exalted. :/ though I am not adverse to the idea of running non-Exalted games, or even hosting non-Exalted games. Assuming I get my forum working the way I want, allowing other users to host their own games will definitely be possible.

Ideas like the Lion-Bull War (yes, I still want to run it) and Soul Collectors (ditto) are very much more ambitious and will take time for me to put together, I think. SC will definitely run on my forum; Lion-Bull may still end up on RPoL, simply cause it's easier for me to get players there. Eventually my own forum may have more of a name for itself... who knows?

I'm a one-woman web/sysadmin/programmer though, so it will take time. And I'm trying not to stress myself out, so progress, while it is happening, is slow.

Anyway, here is the short RTJ I sent for Ziziri, more detail will be written later if 1) I'm accepted into the game, 2) I get inspired.

Name: Ziziri Flame-eater

Spirit Shape: Spotted Hyena

Concept: Full Moon Lunar. Dervish of the Savannah. A fierce, savage hunter, who eats everything she kills whole (yes, this has included humans. Unless that's too extreme for you. Then she could just ritually burn them in a pyre.) The title Flame-eater comes from a legend that she once battled an Abacasteri, and consumed the body before it could turn to dust. Whether it's true or not is something only she and her followers know.

Starting Location: Southern desert. Somewhere south of Chiaroscuro I suppose. She and her people would be friendly with but not directly associated with the Delzhan tribes. I think she's a little too 'wild' to stick with them.

Physical Description: At 5'6", Ziziri's body is compact but nonetheless muscular. Her hair is a golden brown shorn short and spiky, and her sun-bronzed flesh -- usually exposed -- is dappled with darker spots like that of her Totem, the Spotted Hyena. Her tattoos compliment the spotted patterns, weaving whorls of silver around them.

Bred in the South, Zizi doesn't care to wear much clothing: leather strips binding her breasts and a fur-lined loincloth are enough. Her feet are bare or at most leather-wrapped. She adorns herself with jewelry of bone, sinew and leather, crudely crafted from the remains of memorable kills. Red is a color of significance to her, and she will often dye her clothing or even paint her face with a pigment mixed with blood.

I dunno what she'll wield yet. Twin weapons of some sort, or natural weapons, probably. The game I sent her in for encourages all the really barbaric activities of Lunars (i.e. they're more the 1st ed type than 2nd, I suppose) -- hunting, pillaging, breeding beastmen and so forth. One thing I like about RPoL is that it expressly forbids depictions of rape, so if we do end up mating with victims they'll have to be willing, or the entire act abstracted.

Man, I kinda really hope I can play this game. ;.; right now forums are all the outlet I even have. I just don't feel I can trust or be comfortable with anyone right now, and my psyche is so fragile that even hints of stressors send me into fits of rage or hopelessness. I'm more likely to assume I just don't have friends... which can be a self-fulfilling prophecy the longer I hide, I suppose.

(it's easier to feel like nothing when no one can find me)

But I still will return by Sunday. 'cause... y'know, Wardragon. Needs it. :( Well, even if there's no WD I'd come by.